Is It Weird to Go to a Singles Event Alone?
Not even a little. At DateFaster events, roughly 70% of attendees show up solo. That’s not a guess — we see it at check-in tables across 60+ cities every month. The person standing next to you in line? They probably came alone too.
There’s a mental hurdle most people hit the first time. You picture yourself awkwardly standing in a corner while everyone else chats with their friends. But here’s what actually happens: solo attendees are the most social people in the room. They have to be. And that’s exactly why they tend to get more out of the event.
When you show up with a group, you naturally gravitate back to your friends between conversations. Solo? You keep meeting new people. That’s the whole point of being there.
Why Going Alone Actually Works Better
Going solo removes the social safety net — and that’s a feature, not a bug. Here’s what we’ve noticed from hosting hundreds of singles events across the country.
You’re More Approachable
A person standing alone with a drink looks available for conversation. A group of three friends laughing together? That’s a wall most people won’t breach. Body language research backs this up — singles are perceived as more open and easier to approach than people in groups.
No Friend Drama
We’ve seen it play out dozens of times. One friend wants to leave early. Another is monopolizing someone you wanted to talk to. A third keeps pulling you aside to gossip. Going alone means your night is yours. You stay as long as you want, talk to whoever interests you, and leave when you’re ready.
You Actually Push Yourself
With friends around, it’s easy to spend the whole event in your comfort zone. Solo attendees don’t have that option. They introduce themselves, start conversations, and take small risks. Singles tell us their best connections happen when they had no one to fall back on.
What to Do Before the Event
A little prep goes a long way when you’re flying solo. You don’t need a strategy document — just a few things to set yourself up right.
Pick the Right Event
Not all singles events are built the same. Speed dating is fantastic for solo attendees because the format does the work for you — everyone rotates, everyone talks, no one sits alone. Mixers are great too, but they require a bit more initiative since conversations happen organically.
If it’s your first time, speed dating is the easier entry point. The structure removes the “who do I talk to?” anxiety entirely.
Arrive on Time (Seriously)
Showing up right when the event starts is the best move for solo attendees. The room is smaller, people are still settling in, and the host is often making introductions. Walk in 45 minutes late and everyone’s already paired off in conversations — that’s when it feels awkward.
Eat Something First
This sounds basic but it matters. You’re going to be talking for 1-2 hours, probably having a drink or two. An empty stomach makes you jittery, speeds up how alcohol hits, and kills your energy halfway through. Grab dinner beforehand. Your future self will thank you.
How to Work the Room Solo
You’ve arrived. You’re alone. The room is filling up. Here’s your playbook.
Start at the Bar or Check-In Table
These are natural conversation zones. Everyone’s waiting, everyone’s a little nervous, and there’s a built-in opener: “Have you been to one of these before?” That single question has launched thousands of connections at our events. It works because it’s genuine — you’re both in the same situation.
Use the Host
Good event hosts know that solo attendees sometimes need a nudge. At DateFaster events, our hosts actively introduce people, especially early in the night. Don’t be shy about saying hi to the organizer — they want you to have a great time and they’ll happily connect you with someone.
Move Around
The biggest mistake solo attendees make is planting themselves in one spot for the entire event. Physically moving through the room creates opportunities. Walk to the other end of the bar. Check out the appetizer table. Stand near a different group. Each move is a chance to catch someone’s eye or start a fresh conversation.
Set a Mini Goal
Don’t try to meet everyone. Give yourself a simple target: talk to five new people tonight. That’s it. Five genuine conversations is plenty. It takes the pressure off — you’re not trying to find your soulmate, you’re just meeting five humans. Some will click. Some won’t. That’s normal and fine.
What If You Get Nervous?
You will. That’s not a “what if” — it’s a “when.” Every single person at that event felt some version of nerves before walking in. The confident-looking guy at the bar? Nervous. The woman laughing loudly with someone she just met? She was nervous ten minutes ago.
Nervousness and excitement are the same chemical response. Your brain just labels them differently. Try reframing: you’re not anxious, you’re activated. Your body is prepping you to be social, alert, and present. That’s exactly what you need.
The 3-Second Rule
When you spot someone you want to talk to, you have about three seconds before your brain starts manufacturing reasons not to. They look busy. They probably don’t want to be interrupted. I should wait for a better moment. None of that is real. Walk over within three seconds and say hello. The longer you wait, the harder it gets.
Give Yourself an Out
If the anxiety gets real, have a plan. Tell yourself: I’ll stay for 45 minutes. If I’m miserable, I’ll leave. Most people find that once they start talking, the nerves dissolve. But knowing you can leave at any time makes it easier to stay.
What Solo Attendees Always Get Wrong
After watching thousands of people come through our events, certain patterns jump out. Avoid these and you’re already ahead.
Staying on Your Phone
Your phone is a security blanket, not a social tool. The second you pull it out, you’re signaling don’t talk to me. Put it in your pocket or bag. If you need something to do with your hands, hold a drink.
Only Talking to People You’re Attracted To
The biggest connections often come through unexpected conversations. Talk to everyone — not just the people you’d swipe right on. The guy who isn’t your type might introduce you to his friend who is. The woman you chat with might become a genuine friend. Networking at singles events is underrated.
Leaving Too Early
The best conversations usually happen in the second half of the event when everyone’s loosened up. If you leave after 30 minutes because “it’s not working,” you missed the good part. Give it at least an hour.
A Solo Attendee’s Timeline
Here’s roughly how a typical solo night at a DateFaster singles event plays out:
6:45 PM — Arrive, check in, grab a drink. Scan the room. Breathe.
7:00 PM — Event starts. Host welcomes everyone. If it’s speed dating, you’ll get your card and instructions. If it’s a mixer, the host might do a quick icebreaker.
7:15 PM — First real conversations. Everyone’s a little stiff. That’s normal. Keep it light — name, what you do, what brought you here tonight.
7:45 PM — Things warm up. You’ve talked to a few people. You’re starting to feel the rhythm. This is where the fun begins.
8:15 PM — The sweet spot. People are relaxed, laughing, and genuinely connecting. This is when the best conversations happen.
8:45 PM — Event winds down. Exchange info with anyone you clicked with. Thank the host.
9:00 PM — Head home feeling accomplished. You did the thing.
FAQ
Do most people come to singles events alone?
Yes. At DateFaster events, around 70% of attendees arrive solo. It’s the norm, not the exception. Event hosts are used to it and often help introduce solo attendees to each other.
What if nobody talks to me?
At structured events like speed dating, this literally can’t happen — everyone talks to everyone. At mixers, start conversations yourself. Most people are hoping someone will approach them, so you’ll almost always get a warm reception.
Should I bring a friend as backup?
You can, but set ground rules first. Agree to split up once you arrive and check in with each other once or twice. The worst outcome is spending the whole event talking to someone you already know.
How do I leave a conversation that isn’t going well?
Keep it simple and kind: “It was really nice talking to you — I’m going to grab another drink.” No one takes it personally. At singles events, short conversations are expected and normal.
What should I wear to a singles event if I’m going alone?
Something you feel confident in that matches the venue vibe. Business casual works for most events. The goal is to feel like yourself, not like you’re wearing a costume. Comfortable shoes matter — you’ll be standing and moving around.